I had a really good feeling about him right away. His initial message was thoughtful. He came across as sincere, sensitive, and detail oriented. He appreciated my writing, my values, and resonated with what I was looking for.

We had an easy, fluid back and forth with several long message exchanges getting to know each other. He felt available, curious, interested, and I could feel that we were mutually drawn to each other. We made plans to go on a date. The first time that our schedules aligned was 6 days away and that felt like a long time. But I felt happy and excited.

Once the date was scheduled, I remembered that we both had selected Hot Springs as an interest. I asked him which hot springs he liked to go to. He mentioned that he was planning to go to Harbin after work the next night. Then he invited me to come, saying it would definitely be “an unconventional first date.” I thought about it for a few minutes. I imagined him watching the incoming text bubble appear and disappear while I thought about it. My first instinct was to say yes. Then I wondered if it was a red flag to be naked on a first date or if he would think I was “easy” for agreeing to that. Eventually I said, Yes, let’s meet at Harbin tomorrow night.”

We planned to meet for dinner at the cafe and then go in the pools. I got there a couple of hours early to relax and enjoy some quiet time. I enjoyed my slow pace as I took my time getting undressed and made my way to the shower. I had the intention for the evening to allow myself to be as naked and free as I would be if no one was watching. As I showered, I slowly soaped my whole body taking time to enjoy the feeling of my hands on my breasts, my belly and hips, and even between my legs. It wasn’t overtly sexual, I was just taking a shower, but I imagine it could have looked sexy.

After my shower, I walked over to the Heart pool. As I was standing naked at the top of the stairs, I locked eyes with my friend’s husband standing in the pool just a few feet from me. After my initial surprise, it wasn’t a big deal, but he was much chattier that I prefer and slightly unaware of my personal space for two people naked in a pool. After a few minutes, I let him know that I was moving to the silent pools. I did 3 hot cold plunges and meditated with Quan Yin for some time.

I gave myself plenty of time to dry off, get dressed and get to the cafe to meet my date. I was nervous and excited. My heart skipped a beat when I saw a deep blue SUV parking and recognized him getting out. He had a fitted navy blue shirt and dark, fairly tight jeans on. He was cute and looked exactly like his photos. I felt relieved. He gave me a big, warm hug as we greeted each other. During the embrace, he said in a soft voice into my ear, “You smell incredible.” That was sexy. I felt a pulse between my legs at feeling his breath and lips brush my ear.

We had a great, easy conversation through dinner. Finally he said, “Shall we go for a swim?” I smiled, blushing a bit and said, “Yes.”

As we walked up to the pools, he was telling me that he had been reading my blog. (Not this one, but my other blog that is linked to from my Instagram account.) He said he had stayed up late reading my words and really felt moved by my writing. I was a bit out of breath, but managed to thank him and let him know that meant a lot to me. My body felt so calm with him. There was no doubt that he was into me. I could feel his genuine positive regard and respect. I loved how that felt for me on the inside. I felt so free to be my full self.

Then the moment came for us to take off our clothes. I faced him and looked into his eyes as I took my shirt off and unhooked my bra. He held my gaze, but I could feel him wanting to look at my boobs. I liked that in this moment. I took off my pants and underwear in the same movement and took my time folding them into my bag. My heart was pounding in my chest and I felt warm despite the cool breeze grazing my naked body.

When we were both naked, he gave me a high five and said, “We did it. I’m proud of us.” I laughed. We walked over the the showers and I repeated my earlier performance with the soap even though I already felt very clean and smooth. I don’t know if he saw, but I’d like to think he caught a glimpse of my hands caressing my breasts with soap.

We decided to go straight to the large, silent pool. He walked slightly behind me, hopefully enjoying my amazing ass. For a short time I floated on my back in the deeper pool. I enjoyed how just my nipples, face, and toes popped out of the water. I liked how hard and erect they were. As I came over next to him our arms and shoulders touched slightly. He whispered to me that my tan was much better than his. I whispered back that it was just my arms, and extended my lower leg out of the water to expose its lack of tan. I liked my cute pink toenails and perfect pedicure. He ran his fingers over my toes and said, “Your toes are beautiful.” It didn’t feel creepy like he had a foot fetish, but sincere and sweet. The whispering in my ear was really doing it for me. As we stood there facing each other, I caught him glancing at my large breasts which were bobbing proudly to the surface of the water. I could feel his attraction to me and that felt amazing. I also felt completely safe with him. The words “mature masculine” floated through my head.

Together we did 5 hot cold plunges one after the other. With each one my body felt more relaxed and alive. We sat together for a long time with our arms touching in front of Quan Yin. At one point, he leaned into me slightly and whispered, “This is one of my favorite places in the world. I’m so happy to be here with you.” My heart melted. That was so incredibly sweet. I didn’t respond verbally, but leaned back into him a bit and smiled.

As we walked together to the Heart pool our hands brushed a few times. I felt the electricity each time we touched slightly. I love this kind of long, slow buildup, even if it doesn’t go anywhere anytime soon. It all matters to me so much.

I noticed how he matched my pace as we walked. I felt how he wanted to be next to me, wanted to be close to me. We talked quietly for a long time in the Heart pool. We talked about travel, our jobs, his child, our summer plans, and about how nudity stops being such a big deal once everyone is naked and gets over themselves. I talked about my love for waterfalls and swimming cold mountain lakes, naked whenever possible.

There wasn’t an awkward moment. Even lulls in the conversation felt comfortable. With help from the warm healing waters I felt myself very relaxed, happy and at peace. My heart felt so open, I felt so engaged and interested in what he was sharing with me. I felt his interest and attention on me as well. I felt the water, his attention, the energy between us quenching a deep part of me that has been in a long draught.

Eventually our hands were turning pruny and we decided that it was time to get out of the water. We walked back to our things and I wrapped my prettiest sarong around myself. He asked if I wanted to lay on the lounge chairs and look up at the stars for a bit. I’ve honestly never wanted to do anything more.

I am always completely seduced by the stars and the moon. The stars were so magnificently visible and sparkly. The waning moon was almost a sliver. It was dark with a warm breeze. I felt that feeling I get sometimes when I want a moment to last forever. I take in all the details, make a mental snapshot, so I can recreate it another time as I drift off to sleep and into a fantasy. So many times I’ve been alone looking at the stars or the moon and felt overwhelmed by the beauty of it all and a bit sad to have no one to share it with. We shared this moment together so naturally. I felt happy and at peace.

Slowly we got dressed and made our way out of the pool area. Part of me wanted to lead him down to the spot where the waters flow through and waterfall down to a stream through the roots of a gorgeous fig tree. There’s a goddess face carved into the roots. A beautifully hand-carved bridge leads to a perfect place for a first kiss.

I stayed quiet though and let that moment pass. Maybe next time. I felt so good, so full, so at peace. I don’t know that I was ready for a kiss actually, but I wouldn’t have said no.

He walked me to my car and we both said what a great time we had. His lips kissed my cheek as he hugged me. His hug felt like sunshine, so warm and gently enthusiastic. I rested against him for a few seconds feeling safe and held. As I pulled away, I felt the moment where he wanted to kiss me, but I didn’t let it happen for some reason. I touched his shoulder and arm softly and said, “Goodnight.”

As I drove the long, winding road home smiling, I realized that he was calling me. He was driving right behind me. We talked on the phone for a while as we drove. It was so comforting. We got a little playful and he told me that I had used the word “erotic” three times that night. I hadn’t realized that. Apparently he was counting. We parted ways on the road and said goodnight again. He asked me to text him when I got home.

It all felt so right. My nervous system was calm. I felt grounded. I also felt turned on, alive, and desired. Being naked is so vulnerable and honest. I loved it.

A naked first date could go a lot of ways. This one was perfect.