This time my invitation to him is to find my edges and nudge them. I invite us to both be naked this time. I invite him to use his mouth on my body.

I spend hours getting ready for him. I hydrate. I slowly, sensually shave my entire body in anticipation of his hands and mouth savoring my smooth skin. I lather myself with my best smelling body wash. I dry myself with a fresh towel. I massage my best smelling lotion onto my breasts, my arms, my belly, my ass, my legs and my feet. I anoint my pulse points with my favorite scent, Palo Santo fragrance oil, and I make a prayer to center my pleasure and soak up all of his attention and affection into my being so that I may know what a sexy, beautiful, sensual goddess I am at all times.

I slide on my sexiest red underwear. I want him to slowly take them off of me. I chose a beautiful red bra that makes my breasts look incredible. I want him to melt with desire. I remember how he said I don’t have to try to be sexy, but I still do try. I like to try. I choose the shirt with the buttons I know he likes to undo. I spray my face with rose water mist, drink one last glass of water, apply my lightly tinted lippy, slide my freshly pedicured feet into my best sandals and take a deep breath as I head out the door to meet him.

I have plenty of time. I drive slowly, I find parking, I walk slowly up the hill and up the stairs and knock on the door under the prayer flags. He answers looking so tan, skin shining and hydrated, so fresh and clean. He draws me in and gives me a big hug. He’s so tall and handsome. So strong and warm. He runs his hands over my body and says my name. “You feel so good.”

He’s excited to see me. I’m excited to see him. We sit and talk for a bit. He calms my worries. We talk about our boundaries, about how to be responsible for our own sense of safety. We talk about our desires and how our work together has evolved over the years. I move slowly and consider things for a long time before acting on them. He respects and appreciates that about me. He loves working with me, he says. It’s very exciting for him. Me too…

We talk about him using his mouth. My limits are no kissing, no oral sex, and no penetration. We each express that we have the desire to kiss on the mouth, but are unsure if it serves my best interest in the work we’re doing. I worry it will make me feel too attached. I’m going to consider it for next time though. I like knowing that he desires to kiss me. I feel warm and cared for at his consideration of me and my process. I have yet to find a single boundary of his, he’s a yes to everything I desire so far within the boundary of the time we have together.

We talk about how we will get naked. He asks if I want him to remove my clothes. I do. It’s my favorite thing to be undressed by a man I desire. He kneels down on the sheepskin rug so that his head is at my breasts. He pulls me to him and wraps his arms around me, feeling my back, my ass, my legs, and finally my breasts. He buries his head into my breasts and makes noises of pleasure and appreciation. I love how much time he takes with my body before taking my clothes off. I love how it feels like the first time he’s touched me every time.

He undoes the last 2 buttons on my shirt. I love that he did that again. He traces the top of my breasts with his finger. I love how he touches me. He looks into my eyes and asks, “Do you feel connected?” I do. I nod my head yes. He slides his hands under my shirt and slowly lifts it over my head. He runs his hands over my bra, presses his lips against my breasts again and moans. He unhooks my bra and looking in my eyes removes it saying, “You’re so fucking sexy.”

Then he slides down my pants, removing them, and slides his hands back up my legs to feel my ass over my sexy underwear. Then he slowly pulls them down and takes them off. I had wanted to ask him to do that and he did even though I didn’t ask. He just knew how I wanted it.

Then he stands up for me to take his clothes off. I take some time feeling his body. His skin is so soft and smooth on his strong arms. I feel his chest and notice the few gray hairs in his chest hair. I love the hair on his chest. I want to bury my face in it.

I reach my hands under his tank top and feel the sides of his body as I move it up and over his head. He moans at my touch. He likes the way that I touch him. I take some more time to touch his stomach and my favorite part on many men, the muscle that sticks out a little on each side just over the hip bones. His body is so sexy. I love touching him. I get lost in it.

I slide his shorts down. He’s not wearing underwear. We are both naked. He asks if I want to get on the table. I do. I can’t wait to feel his hands on me.

I lie on my stomach. I’m completely naked. There’s no top sheet anymore. No reason to cover any part of me. No remaining modesty.

I feel him drizzling oil up my legs. His hands and fingers sliding up the inside of my thigh and brushing my pussy and my butthole sending shivers through me. To my surprise, he leans over the table and I feel his mouth on my butt. The feeling of his slightly scratchy beard and his mouth kissing and sucking on my butt cheek is mindblowing. I hadn’t expected that, but I love it.

He spends so much time massaging, kissing, and sucking my ass. His tongue and lips are getting closer and closer to my asshole. It feels so incredible. I didn’t think of this or ask for it, but I like it so much. I don’t want it to stop. He reaches his hand up between my legs so that just his fingertips are touching my clit. He moans feeling my wetness. “You’re so fucking juicy. Your pussy feels so good.”

He barely moves his hand. My hips are undulating. I’m moving them rhythmically and moaning. I move my clit up and down on his fingertips. I love being in control like this. I love that he knows how to touch me and to let me rub myself on him. He keeps gently biting my ass and licking so close to my asshole even kissing the tiny area between my ass and my pussy. My body screams for him to devour me, but instead my whole pussy pulses with desire and pleasure as he teases me with his mouth and fingertips staying with my boundaries.

My hands find his leg. I feel his knee, his thigh, his butt. He loves the way I am touching him. Then I reached between his legs feeling his balls stretched tight and his hard cock. He moans and tells me how good it feels when I touch his cock.

I had been nervous about touching his cock, but I liked it. It felt so good, natural. Maybe next time I will spend more time touching it. I feel like I could worship his cock. I liked the energy of it.

We spend so much time with his hands and mouth on my ass, his fingers resting at my clit, me grinding my hips and writhing in pleasure.

I’m moaning, sounds of intense pleasure escaping me at times. There’s a moment where I think I could orgasm, I want to, I want him to feel me climax. I could have directed him on what to do. I could have asked for him to stroke my labia and massage my clit a bit more. I didn’t for some reason. Maybe next time I will tell him that I want him to help me orgasm.

I can feel him getting really turned on. He gets on the table and lays on top of me. His hard cock is pressing against my ass. He reaches his hands under my upper body and firmly massages my breasts. He cock is now sliding in and out between my thighs.

I feel the desire to ask him to have his way with me. I want him to fuck me. I want to feel him deep inside me. If we were lovers, I would have anal sex with him. I imagine it would be amazing. I can feel how badly he wants it. It’s so hot. I think he can feel how badly I want it too. I love the way this longing and desire feel.

He’s got his hand in my hair, pulling it slightly in a way that I love. He’s kissing my shoulder and my neck from behind. It all feels so incredible. I love the scratchy feel of his beard and the softness of his lips.

He gets off the table and runs his hands up and down my body, smacking each of my ass cheeks in a way that makes me jump. I feel some of the wetness come out of my pussy. I love it when he spanks me like that. It makes me so excited. I love the confidence he has about it. He means it and knows I love it.

He asks me to turn over. As I do, his hands find my breasts and he leans down to wrap his mouth around my nipple. I moan so loudly. I feel the sensation so deeply in my pussy. He’s on top of me again. Holding me tightly, sucking on my nipples so strongly and massaging my boobs with urgency.

Then his hand is under my neck, holding my head, and he kisses my neck as I arch my back and then grind my hips into his. The tip of his cock slides so briefly across my clit and I almost orgasm. I consider asking him to massage my clit with the top of his cock. I want him to put just the tip in. I almost laugh about that. It’s never just the tip. I desire the feeling of him plunging his cock deep into me.

Then he moves his mouth down to my stomach and to the side of my pussy where my upper thigh starts. He kisses me so gently and sweetly, everywhere but on my pussy, because that’s what I have asked for.

He’s back on top of me looking in my eyes and checking in. I tell him I got a little overwhelmed and he says that he noticed. He says he loves being here with me. He loves connecting with me in this way. We slow things down a little. He kisses my neck and the side of my face. I am touching his arms, his back, and running my fingers in his hair. I feel the desire to kiss on the lips and it feels mutual, but we don’t because that’s what we agreed to.

His cock is hard and pressing against my pussy. He slides it under between my butt cheeks and asks if it’s okay like that. I say yes. He’s thrusting in and out between my cheeks, not penetrating me, but close. After a little while I tell him I want to be on my stomach again.

I like pushing my body into his hands, I like moving like a jungle cat under him, I feel my primal, sensual power rising and escaping in my moans and exhales. I am just really getting into my grove, when he comes beside me and asks if I want anything else.

I know that means our time is almost up. I want him to hold me. I want him to make love to me. I want so much that I can’t verbalize anything. I realize too long has passed since he asked me the question. I say, “I don’t know, I like this right now.” His fingers are interlaced with mine. I wasn’t even aware of that happening. He’s kissing the side of my face. His other hand is moving up and down my body. It feels so good.

I was in the jungle cat zone and I don’t know how to transition.

Next time I will ask him to decide how we close the session. It was too much for me to decide right then. He runs his fingers over my body lighter and more lightly until he’s done. He then backs away from the table and I look up at him. I have no idea what to say. I am pure desire, pure dopamine, pure sexual, erotic energy. I want him to fuck me for hours and hours, but that’s not what we’re doing here.

I do some cat/cow stretches on the table and get up off of it. He’s sitting naked on the couch. I join him. I tell him about feeling like a jungle cat, feeling empowered and immersed in my movements and pleasure. He says he felt it.

Before I know what’s happening, he says, “I love you.” I am so shocked. I didn’t expect that. I know he means it in a different way than I would mean it if I said it, but still, he loves me. It takes me a bit to process. I am being awkward and I don’t know how to stop it. Slowly I say, “I love you too,” We stare at each other. He asks if I want to shower. I have no idea if he means together, but I think he probably doesn’t mean that. I say no.

He gets up to put a beautiful silk robe on. I compliment him on it. I wish I had a robe like this. I want to cuddle up with him in silk robes and have tea and talk for hours. Instead I start putting my clothes on. He says, “Do you need anything?” I ask him for a hug and he is hugging me before I even finish the sentence. He’s inhaling me, caressing me and it feels so good. We almost get pulled back in under the spell, but he pulls away and says, “Have a good night. I’ll text you tomorrow.” I say, okay, and he walks me to the door.

I feel amazing. I walk down the steps and down the hill to my car in disbelief about how light and good my body feels. I am under the influence of erotic pleasure, of sensual attention, of having a gorgeous man focus all his energy on giving me pleasure for 2 hours. I give myself this gift of care because I am worth it. I love this feeling.