What is conscious intimacy? What does it mean to me? What does it feel like? I want to explore deeply so I can create more of it in my life.

When I think of intimacy, I long to feel comfort and at ease in my body, mind and spirit in the presence of my lover. I feel a desire to be seen, to watch him enjoying me with his loving eyes and open, caring heart. I want to feel how strongly he wants to be there with me and wants to know me at my deepest levels. He wants to share his heart and desires with me. Our hearts are open to receiving each other as we are in the moment.

It feels intimate to me to have periods of silence, just experiencing each other’s unconditional positive regard. A part of intimacy I love is lightly running my fingertips along my lover’s skin. I love to feel him with my fingertips. To trace his body, feel his skin, understand his sensitive places. I love to hear his heartbeat, the rise and fall of his chest as he breaths, to smell his scent, to feel the places his hair grows and the places it doesn’t. I could touch my lover gently for hours, just resting my body into his, feeling held and sharing the thoughts on my heart and listening to him share. This time together, my body entangled with his body, the places we become one, are so sacred to me. This is heaven to me.

I love noticing as my lover’s desire grows as much as I love feeling my own body fill with desire. I love to feel his cock harden and expand with my touch. I love to feel his desire for me and the way he comes towards me wanting our bodies to be closer, to become one. Feeling his breath on my skin melts me. I love to feel his passion in the way he kisses me, how his hands caress my body both gently and more strongly with passion, and the heat our bodies create together. I long to be made love to. I long to make love with my lover. I want him to look deep into my eyes, I want to see his love and desire for me, his ecstasy in my pleasure, our fingers intertwined and hands held tightly.

I deeply desire for him to center me, my pleasure, my orgasm in our lovemaking. I long to feel all of me welcomed, cherished, held and deeply desired. The most intimate experience I can offer him is to let him see me in my pure state of pleasure, unleashed, unwound, embracing my inner wildness for him to experience. I long to be supported and held in this state by him, to be able to show him how much pleasure I can experience when his body makes love mine in this way, slowly and savoring every part of me. I melt at feeling him love me with his entire being. I want to feel this in my bones and all of my cells. YES! He longs to receive the full power of my undulating ecstatic state of orgasm.

I pray to release and let go of all parts of me that ever felt ashamed, insecure, worried about doing it wrong or not being enough. I want our intimacy to be so palpable, so raw and true, that I can surrender to myself and let go fully. I want to trust that he can hold me, that he can stay present with me, and give me the time and space I need. I long to trust that he is desiring me as much as I desire him and our closeness, our intimacy.

I long to feel a timelessness, an ease and joy at the ebbs and flows of our turn on, our climaxing and our rest and recovery. I love exploring each other’s bodies deeply, in detail, and discovering our unique and most special parts and how they like to be touched. I long for eye contact, ear whispering, moaning, sounds of pleasure, and sweet, soft silence.

I long for all of this to be just the beginning, never too much, for all of me to be desired, celebrated, and cherished. I need him to find me, to see me, and to pursue me and not let go of me. I need to feel his care, to know that he wants to be with me, and to be able to be my full self with him. I need for us to find a deeper channel into love through loving our own and each other’s messy imperfections and sharing our strengths and weaknesses with each other honestly and authentically. I desire to learn him, to teach myself to him, to know more about each other with him and explore all the channels of intimacy possible between us gently, respectfully, passionately with trust and courage.